my heart breaks

One boy passed court and one did not.

I can't stop crying...

We have another court date next week Wednesday. His dad did not show up for court and the court wouldn't let another relative relinquish him. So now this relative has to travel back 10 hours to the town and see the police to get a report stating the dad disappeared and travel back to Addis for next Wednesday's court date.

This is the hardest journey I have ever been on.

Less than 24 hours

I am giddy...excited...nervous...overwhelmed...and everything in the middle. I have so many emotions running wild inside of me that I feel that I should jump up and down and run a marathon to get them all out. There are moments where I seem that I might just burst...in a good way. I am honestly excited for whatever happens...in the end God is going to get all the glory and I have to trust. Trust that he is working for my good. Trust that He knows best. Trust that even if they don't pass tomorrow that they will in His perfect timing. Trust that He is stretching and molding me to be more like him.

So with that being said, in less than 24 hours we will know if the boys are forever ours.

Prayer for Wednesday

5 days and counting until our court date...

I am trusting God's best for our family. As a woman it is so hard to not obsess over it. Thoughts permeate my mind constantly all the while I am trying to channel them into prayers. I want to have the childlike faith of my girls - I seem to have guarded my heart trying to prepare for the "what-if" situations, but that is not how God wants me to live. He wants me to wholly abandon the worldly scenarios that I play in my mind and to fully trust him.

Adoption is the most mentally - emotionally exhausting thing that I have ever done, but I wouldn't change it for anything. It has taught me so many things about God's character. It has brought a deeper understanding of God and who he is and what he has done for me through adoption.

I wanted to be able to share with the boys all the people who prayed for us. Would you leave a comment with your name and state in which you live? Then I can put it on a map for them to see God's people uniting at his throne of Grace. I know I will be blessed right now and they will be blessed in the future when they can understand.

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." 1Thessalonians 5:16-18

I feel so dumb!

It was my night to pick up the kids from RAD (Wednesday church for the kids). I carpool with my sister-in-law.

Well, I arrive at 8:30 thinking that I am right on time to realize that it was done at 8:00.

I felt so completely dumb! Of course they were the last ones there and had already called my husband to see if I was coming. I don't embarrass easily, but tonight I was!

So thank you to the leaders who stayed late to watch my kids...I am really sorry!

Can I live

Wow - this is a great music video. I have no idea who Nick Cannon is or what he stands for, but this will make you think.

More prayers...

Grace came into the kitchen and said, "Mom, wouldn't it be great if God gave everyone in our church the heart to adopt? Then there would be maybe 20, no 30, no maybe even 40 less orphans in the world."

We prayed right there that God would awaken our church and that their hearts would be open to adoption.

How glorious would that be if there were 40 less orphans who lived right here in our little town? I love how God has opened her eyes to His heart.

God answers even small prayers.

I have been praying for an over abundance of apples. Yes, I know it is a small prayer, something that might seem unimportant to most, but I know God cares about all my desires no matter how small. I put a request in our church email - it went out this morning and would you know by noon a dear woman called from church saying I could have ALL of her apples. What to know what makes this even better? I never prayed about what kind of apples, but my favorite is the harrelson apple. Yup, you guessed it...she has two trees full of them.

This was a good lesson for me this morning because so many times I get caught up in my "big" prayer requests that I forget to pray for the small unnoticeable everyday activities of my life. I need to pray more without ceasing and I need to pray aloud so my children can see and hear. It is easy to be a closet prayer, but if I never pray out loud for my kids to hear, how will they ever learn?

I wish you all could hear Adie pray for our meals. Sometimes she can go on for minutes at a time praying for her brothers and for her sisters and mom and dad. And no matter what her prayer is about, she is thankful that she was able to go swimming with her mommy. (I think I need to take her more often.)